As a solo single mom, I am a pretty attached parent by default, but I don’t think I consciously practice attachment parenting. I don’t read the books or studies. But, like Kourtney Kardashian recently revealed to Redbook, sometimes I too just go with the flow. I take an organic approach to the idea.
“It’s what came naturally to me; I didn’t plan it. When I had Mason, I just felt really attached to him and wanted to bring him everywhere. He ended up sleeping with me, and I breastfed for 14 months,” Kourtney tells the glossy.
I get it. Jack is 6 and sometimes he shows up in my bed in the middle of the night and I don’t point him back to his bed or walk him back to his room after a cup of water. This doesn’t mean I have a “family bed,” but it does mean I admittedly don’t care if he sleeps in my bed (we all gotta sleep!).
This little human lived in my body for nine months under my heart. When he was born, the two of us came home to our cozy apartment and to this day, my son has never met his dad (that’s on dad). I have a fighting urge to protect and comfort him, stronger than the average mama bear, because I am a papa bear, too. I am two roles in one body.
All Jack knows is me and our way of life together. There’s no such thing as the other parent taking him to a baseball game or a movie—Jack gets me 24/7 and that really speaks volumes of our tight bond and uh my semi attachment parenting. He’s completely used to me when it comes to soothing, playing, and every other xyz source of his well-being. And, boy, does he rely on me.
I certainly don’t think it’s a bad thing to let a young child sleep or cuddle with his parent, and I actually feel it sets the child up for success. They learn to trust and go with their gut when they need an extra hand. Which is what I do. I go with my gut.
There’s not one part of me that thinks it’s wrong for my son to sleep in my bed from time to time. Besides, he goes to sleep fine in his bed every night. Most nights he stays in his bed from 8 p.m. to dawn. This tells me he is secure.
But on the nights he wanders into my room and crawls in next to me, I let him, because something inside of him is telling him he wants to be near me. Maybe he’s scared, or lonely, or bored, or heard the wind … whatever the case, he is human, we are human, and we are wired to connect with people. It’s healthy. It’s why we’re on this Earth.
