Before I had kids, if you’d asked me what kind of parent I wanted to be, I would have mumbled, “Um, I don’t know, a good one?” Parenting styles were not something I ever thought about, but that all changed when I had my first baby. I was so desperately in love with my newborn, I couldn’t put her down. I breastfed her exclusively, wore her on my chest, and frequently slept with her, so I figured I must be an attachment parent. I read Dr. Sears’ famous book on the subject, and a lot of his philosophies spoke to me.
But after six months, I wasn’t just attached–I was psychotic from lack of sleep and unable to function anymore, waking up every hour to feed my little vampire. Suddenly, sleep training the baby and putting her on a schedule sounded like a really good idea! Not exactly attachment parenting, but it worked for us. Now, with two kids, I’m still trying on different parenting styles to figure out makes sense for our family, and it’s a moving target–what works today may not always work tomorrow. That’s why I find it so interesting and helpful to hear from other moms about their parenting philosophies. I’m glad these celebrity moms were willing to share their experiences and chat about their parenting styles. Click through the slide show to hear what some of our favorite celebrity moms had to say…
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Celebrity Moms Get Real About Their Parenting Styles
Alanis Morissette
Children: Ever, 5 Parenting Style: Attachment Parent
Back when Ever was a toddler, Morissette told ABC News that she would breastfeed him "until he was finished and weaned," regardless of his age. "I'm always available if he needs me, period. I love snuggling and sleeping next to him."Photo: Alanis Morissette/Instagram
Alicia Silverstone
Children: Bear Blu, 4 Parenting Style: Attachment Parent "Breastfeeding isn't just for mealtimes. It's also a magical antidote for a baby's fear, anxiety, loneliness, pain, and overstimulation," Silverstone wrote in her book, Kind Mama. "You're telling your baby in the most powerful way that he's safe and cared for. And when you do that, you create a path for him to feel emotionally and psychologically secure for the rest of his life." Alicia also practiced pre-mastication, meaning she chewed food and then fed it to her baby. Photo: Alicia Silverstone/Instagram
Alyssa Milano
Children: Milo, 4, Elizabella, 1Parenting Philosophy: Let them be "I try to give Milo as much independence as possible," she said in an interview with WebMd. " I think the most important thing to do as a parent is to allow your child to be whoever he or she is, and to encourage that."Photo: Alyssa Milano/Instagram
Angelina Jolie
Children: Maddox, 14, Pax, 11, Zahara, 10, Shiloh, 9. Knox, 7, Vivienne, 7 Parenting Style: Unconventional Until recently, Angelina's six kids were home schooled, based on her belief that the best education is seeing the world. "We travel and I'm the first person to say, 'Get the school work done as quickly as possible because let's go out and explore,'" Jolie revealed to The Independent. "I'd rather them go to a museum and learn to play guitar and read and pick a book they love." Angelina has also been applauded for supporting daughter Shiloh's wish to dress as a boy.Photo: Angelina Jolie/Instagram
Candace Cameron Bure
Children: Natasha, 17, Lev, 16, Maksim, 14 Parenting Style: Authoritarian Candace believes in parenting with firm boundaries and discipline. "When [my kids] were young, we would give them a spank on the bottom with instruction in love and prayer," she wrote in LifeWay. "As they've gotten older, we take away items or privileges like phones, TV time, computer time, or hangout time with friends. Recently, we couldn't seem to find anything that was effective for Natasha, so I did what any mother of a 15-year-old girl would do. I took away all her clothes, shoes, and accessories and left her with one pair of tennis shoes, one pair of jeans, one pair of workout shorts, two T-shirts, underwear, socks, and one set of pajamas."Photo: Candace Cameron Bure/Instagram
Emily Blunt
Children: Hazel, 2 Parenting Style: Laid Back “[Raising children] is such a fear-based industry,” the actress said in an interview with Net-a-Porter. “There used to be one book that everyone read, now there’s How to Raise a Gluten-free Baby, How to Raise a Scientific Baby... It’s insanity! So I haven’t read anything, I’m just letting her do her own thing.”Photo: Emily Blunt/Instagram
Gisele Bundchen
Children: Benjamin, 6, Vivian, 3Parenting Philosophy: Loving limits “I’m very nurturing, I come from a large family and my parents were loving," Giselle told British Vogue. "But the most important thing for me as a mum is to keep my word. When I say no, I mean no. I always say they have all the time in the world to sit there saying, ‘I want it, I want it,’ but they are smart, and if I give in to them they know they can get away with it.”Photo: Gisele Bundchen/Instagram
Gwyneth Paltrow
Children: Apple, 11, Moses, 9 Parenting Style: Firm but flexible "I tried to start them off with all of the right foods," the actress and healthy-eating evangelist admitted on her website, GOOP. "But as they got older, the lure of Oreos and cotton candy outweighed the lure of carrots with hummus. And that’s all a part of childhood and I love Oreos too, so I completely understand. I try to make sure that what is on their plate at home is nutritious and tasty and then I loosen way up on the reins when we are out."Photo: Gwyneth Paltrow/Instagram
Gwen Stefani
Children: Kingston, 9, Zuma, 7, Apollo, 2
Parenting Style: Laid back The busy singer, fashion designer, and judge of "The Voice" finds time for her kids whenever she can, even if it's overnight. "I don't want to look back and say, 'Oh my God, I didn't sleep with Zuma that time because I was too tired,' so I’ll just snuggle up with him tonight," she confessed to Stylist. Photo: Gwen Stefani/Instagram
Jada Pinkett Smith
Children: Jaden, 17, Willow, 15 Parenting Style: No rules Jada and husband Will Smith "don't have rules" for their children, she told Essence. "Kids are little people and we're in life to guide them. Trying to rule someone is always an illusion and it's no different with children." Jada also believes in giving her kids the freedom to make their own choices, such as Willow's decision to shave and dye her hair. On her Facebook page , she said, "Even little girls have the RIGHT to own themselves and should not be a slave to even their mother's deepest insecurities, hopes and desires."Photo: Getty
Jessica Alba
Children: Honor, 7, Haven, 4Parenting Style: Let them be “I’m not a helicopter mom,” Jessica told "Access Hollywood." “I’m not like, constantly hovering and not allowing my kid to figure it out. I think they should figure out how to play with their friends and do things independently.”Photo: Jessica Alba/Instagram
Jessica Simpson
Children: Maxwell, 3, Ace, 2Parenting Philosophy: Loving limits "It's so hard to hear your baby cry," Jessica said in an interview with Parents. "Getting in a routine from the start helped us out a lot. You don't have to wonder what the crying is for, because you know it's time to eat, change, or sleep."Photo: Jessica Simpson/Instagram
Jillian Michaels
Children: Lukensia, 5, Phoenix, 3Parenting style: Firm but flexible "I am a strong believer that kids need boundaries, structure, and discipline," Jillian told Momtastic. "[But] by giving my kids a little extra freedom, it’s been easier to get them to follow the rules that are really important. You know, like the ones that keep them safe and the ones that require them to respect others."Photo: Jillian Michaels/Instagram
Jamie-Lynn Sigler
Children: Beau, 2
Parenting Philosophy: Laid Back
"When he’s going through something emotionally, I want to let him figure it out," she told Momtastic. "I don’t tell him that he’s wrong for feeling what he’s feeling. I want him to feel understood. I want him to feel heard. I want him to feel like it’s OK to be mad sometimes and it’s OK to be sad sometimes and it’s OK to not get your way sometimes. I don’t want to punish him for how he feels."Photo: Jamie-Lynn Sigler/Instagram
Kristin Cavallari
Children: Camden, 3, Jaxon, almost 2, Saylor, 3 months
Parenting Style: Loving limits "We have our rules and if you don’t follow the rules, we count to three and if you’re still misbehaving then you go to timeout or to your room," Kristin told Momtastic. "I really want my kids to be able to make their own mistakes and then pick themselves up afterwards. The boys are both very independent. They know that there are rules and they know what they can and can’t do."
Kelly Ripa
Children: Michael, 18, Lola, 14, Joaquin, 13 Parenting Style: Strict When Kelly's kids break the rules, there are consequences, which Lola found out when she lost her phone privileges. "I don't think she likes me, but I don't care," Ripa told Wendy Williams. "I'm like, 'I'm not your friend! I'm your mom.'"Photo: Kelly Ripa/Instagram
Kim Kardashian
Children: North, 2, Saint, 2 monthsParenting Style: Strict
“I am a strict mother,” Kim Kardashian told The Daily Mail. “I’m really fun and playful, but I’m really strict on nap time, and [North ] sleeping in her own crib." Kim acknowledged that she and sister Kourtney have different parenting styles, with Kourtney preferring to bed share.Photo: Kim Kardashian/Instagram
Kourtney Kardashian
Children: Mason, 5, Penelope, 3, and Reign, 1Parenting Style: Attachment Parent "It's what came naturally to me; I didn't plan it,” she revealed during a March 2014 interview with Redbook. “When I had Mason, I just felt really attached to him and wanted to bring him everywhere. He ended up sleeping with me, and I breastfed for 14 months.”Photo: Kourtney Kardashian/Instagram
Kristen Bell
Children: Lincoln, 2, Delta, 1 Parenting Style: Laid Back "I've taken a very casual approach," she said during an interview with Redbook, after the birth of her first baby. "Lincoln sleeps wonderfully on her own and likes being in her crib by herself, and I let her breastfeed until she decided she was done. I definitely value giving her alone time so that when she inevitably isn't the center of everyone's universe when she gets a little bit older, it doesn't feel like the rug is pulled out from underneath her."Photo: Getty
Mayim Bialik
Children: Miles, 10, Fred, 6
Parenting Style: Attachment Parent Mayim is an outspoken proponent of all things attachment parenting, including natural birth, baby wearing, extended breastfeeding, and co-sleeping. In her book, Beyond the Sling: A Real Life Guide to Raising Confident, Loving Children the Attachment Parenting Way, she wrote, “I have never owned a crib. Or a bassinet. We have one bedroom in our house. There are two mattresses in that bedroom. They are next to each other. One is a king-size. One is a full. We all sleep together. In one big bed."Photo: Mayim Bialik/Instagram
Molly Sims
Children: Brooks, 3, Scarlett, 11 monthsParenting Philosophy: Loving limits "You can still be friends with your kid and love your kid more than life itself, but be a parent!" Molly Sims told The Huffington Post. "I'm a really fun parent, but I'm a fun parent with structure -- you still have to sit your tushy down; when we eat, we have to sit at a table; we have to say, 'yes ma'am' and 'thank you.' Maybe it's being Southern -- I can be tough, but I'm fun."Photo: Molly Sims/Instagram
Nicole Richie
Children: Harlow, 8, Sparrow, 6Parenting Philosophy: Two-way communication "My kids operate best when I let them have a voice and I really explain things to them," Nicole told Oprah Winfrey. "Kids want to be told the truth." Photo: Nicole Richie/Instagram
Olivia Wilde
Children: Otis, 1 Parenting Philosophy: Keeping it real Olivia endeared herself to moms everywhere when she posted a disheveled selfie on Instagram. "I call this hairstyle, 'Keep the kid alive,'" she wrote. "Products you'll need: Sweat, string cheese, diaper rash cream, chewed up crayon, snot, and an enthusiastic spritz of panic."Photo: Olivia Wilde/Instagram
Penelope Cruz
Children: Leo, 5, Luna, 2Parenting Style: Resources for Infant Educators (RIE) Along with celebrity parents Tobey Maguire and Jamie Lee Curtis, Penelope follows the teachings of RIE, which advocates treating infants with respect, talking them through situations, and not hovering. "I love it," Cruz said in an interview with The Wall Street Journal. "[RIE is] Really loving and clever about communication and respect from day one." Photo: Penelope Cruz/Instagram
Reese Witherspoon
Children: Ava, 16, Deacon, 12, Tennessee, 3
Parenting Style: Traditional “I grew up in Nashville and my parents taught me to respect my elders," Reese told People . "We’d say things like ‘yes, ma’am’ and ‘no, sir’ to adults. But kids in Los Angeles don’t do that. I’ve drawn the line at my children calling adults by their first names. I tell them they can call people ‘Miss Shannon’ or ‘Miss Heather’ but that using only first names is too familiar. Maybe I’m just old-fashioned.” Reese also believes in kids setting the table and going to church on Sundays. Photo: Reese Witherspoon/Instagram
Sarah Michelle Gellar
Children: Charlotte, 6, Rocky, 3Parenting Philosophy: Don't shelter them "I think as a parent our most important job is to give our kids the skills that they need to be able to go out in the world and make decisions for themselves," Gellar told Momtastic. "Too often we put our kids in these bubbles, like we take the jump ropes out of schools because some kids can’t jump rope and everybody gets a trophy for joining, but that’s not preparing them for the real world. Not everybody comes in first place and not everybody can jump rope really well and that’s OK because those people do something else well." Photo: Sarah Michelle Gellar/Instagram
Shakira
Children: Milan, 3, Sasha, 1Parenting Philosophy: Treat kids as equals "In Spain, parents speak to their children as equals, and I feel that the children respond in turn," Shakira explained to Parents Latina, adding, "Their dad [soccer star Gerard Piqué] and I both grew up in very close-knit families, and that has made us openly affectionate parents."Photo: Shakira/Instagram
Tia Mowry
Children: Cree, 4Parenting Style: Attachment Parent The outspoken supporter of breastfeeding says attachment parenting just came naturally to her. "Being a working mom, my hours are crazy, so I do enjoy doing things like letting Cree sleep with me in bed and taking him everywhere with me," she revealed to Momtastic. Photo: Tia Mowry/Instagram
Victoria Beckham
Children: Brooklyn, 17, Romeo, 13, Cruz, 11, Harper, 4Parenting Style: Strict "We've always been strict with the children. They have great manners. They always say 'please' and 'thank you,' and I think that's very important," Victoria told The Hampton Spectator. "At the same time, they're still fun. They still run around the house and they're crazy and they're singing and they're dancing and they're kicking footballs around, which I don't allow them to do but that seems to be the one area that I can't discipline them in. They will not stop playing football in the house."Photo: Victoria Beckham/Instagram
Heidi Klum
Children: Leni, 11, Henry, 10, Johan, 9, Lou, 6Parenting Philosophy: Mind your manners Heidi is trying to raise kids who are "proper and have good manners," she told Momtastic, so she's careful about not cursing in front of them. "They’re already saying things that they shouldn’t be saying at their age," she admitted. "Leni will sometimes come home and say, ‘What the…,’ And I say, ‘Leni, What the… isn’t a sentence. It’s inappropriate and you can’t say it.’”Photo: Getty
Christina Aguilera
Children: Max, 8, Summer, 1Parenting Philosophy: Loving limits “No child is terrible. When you’re at that age, you’re just learning how to express yourself and balance all these emotions and feelings,” she told Billy Bush about raising a toddler. “I’m definitely an understanding mom … but discipline is a big thing for me too. I’m not raising no brat!”Photo: Christina Aguilera/Instagram
Drew Barrymore
Children: Olive, 3, Frankie, 1Parenting Philosophy: Tell the truth “I’m not going to pretend to my daughters that I’m pure as the driven snow," Drew admitted to InStyle , alluding to her wild child years as a teen star. “Making bad decisions doesn’t make you a bad person. It is how you learn to make better choices.”Photo: Drew Barrymore/Instagram