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Crazy Sh*t Moms Say to Their Kids Constantly

When I find myself arguing with my kids over the most ridiculous sh*it imaginable, I can’t help laughing (y’know, later, when the kids aren’t looking). Sometimes these absurd admonitions take place over breakfast, or on the walk to school. Sometimes my advice is accepted and adhered to, and other times everything. just. breaks. Recently, I read a story in

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